Nicolette Writes

Professional Freelance Writer and Stay-at-Home Mom

Archive for the month “August, 2012”

My Help :-)

Bongi is the lady who helps to clean our house once every week. We have a good relationship. Or so I think… who knows what she really thinks of me – this young girl (younger than she is) with the nice blue BMW, who lives in a nice warm house, with her baby, hardworking husband and a dog (who has more blankets than some of her friends probably have).

I try to share as much as I can with Bongi. And I always feel quite good that I am giving Bongi things to take home.

Then the other day, I was showing Bongi the new blue plates I bought and I told her that I have put the old plates in a box for her to take home.

She was grateful, but her reaction caught me unaware: ‘Yo, Nicolette, you waste money!’ She didn’t say it angrily. It was just a statement (perhaps there was a tone of disbelief).

I didn’t know what to say. I give her all these things, and her thoughts are that I am wasting money?

I guess I just always assumed she must be happy with all the things I give her. I am the good, white benefactor (he he, we don’t want to admit it, but I think this is how we often think of ourselves!). Suddenly, giving didn’t feel so good anymore. Was I wasting money?

I have given the situation a lot of thought, and I have come to the conclusion that it is not that I waste money – I buy with money that we have, and I buy at PEP, JET, and Mr Price, in stead of at Woollies, Truworths and Foschini (well some times I do splurge a bit at these places).

But I have learned that there are people who cannot imagine that you would buy plates if you already have plates; people to whom it seem absurd to buy a R100 mobile for a baby room, just because it is pretty.

Bongi and Alex

I am certainly NOT saying we are not allowed to buy these pretty things if we can buy them. Let’s just never forget the Bongis in life. I guess that’s why I often decide to give the (irritating!) car guard that R2 or R5, even if I am CERTAIN nothing would have happened to my car while I was gone. Because I have the nice blue plates.


In my arms!

I think I’m becoming a mom…

I think I’m becoming a mom…

Okay, so of course I AM a mom – I have adorable, little Alex. But I’ve never really had that mom-feeling. Until yesterday.

I was having a conversation with a group of friends, and while drinking my coffee and having normal conversation, I was successfully managing to keep Alex content and happy at the same time. I was comfortably moving him from my knee to my hip to the floor (as I held him up while he tried standing). I was relaxed. He was happy, I was happy.

How on earth did this happen? Overnight?
‘Time’, dearest new moms. You will get there. Remember my last post? I was about to crack. And it felt like everyone but myself could calm and make my baby happy.

If your baby is about one or two months now and you feel that you are not going to make it – hold out… you will get there! I’m not saying I ‘arrived’ in any way! I know Alex will soon ‘knock me over’ with something new, haha! There will always be ups and downs.

Take it ONE day at a time. Or no, not even one day – take it MOMENT for moment. And with time, it will get easier. It’s going to be fun:-D

ps: If you are at a stage now where you are not getting a lot of sleep, please read this post: (Especially if you believe in SLEEP TRAINING, which I strongly condemn!!)

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